STYLE VOYAGE BY J.N.

Do you ever feel like theres something missing in your life? Well I do. And I finally figured it out today. I was supposed to throw away my old soccer/football clothes. And when I took the clothes out memories started to come. It feels wierd. Cause now I had to let go. Throw the clothes away, and never return to my hobby. I never saw this moment coming. That I really had to let go of something that's a huge part of me, or was. Some picec of clothing reminded me that in the end, I actually were good. If Im honest, I was really great. I played in my lands best team, got to play almost the hole game, played in my districts "like national team" and played for my lands national team. And I were never happy with how I played. Always there was something to complain about. So now when I had to thorw away me training clothes. I prety much regretted my descision. I feel so wierd, and felt like there's something missing. When I still played, I always had something to do: trainings, games and camps. I never had spare time, but that didn't bother me at all. But there's no going backs. Haven't played for over a half year, and although I regret quiting Im happy as I am. More time for my friends, but then again more times when Im all alone. Don't get me wrong, I like how my life looks right now. I just wondered how it would have been if I hadn't quit. It feels strange that I have a summer with almost no plans. First summer I dont have tournaments, trainings, camps or games. I have the hole summer to do absolutly nothing. Im kind of panicing, cause I've never had this much spare time under a summer. And Im scared that everyone else has plans, and Im going to be all alone.
So yes I miss soccer/football but Im happy as I am, just need to find something to replace soccer/football.